From the lovely, funny and talented Jen Drake of Darkwood Consort fame, enjoy! I must also say that these instructions (and very astute observations they are) can apply to conductors which are faced by orchestras of every level (both budget and artistic).
Hey kids, who wants to be a conductor when they grow up? That’s great! Here is your chance to glean some valuable knowledge!
1) You are allotted 2.5 hours in which to complete your rehearsal! Be sure to use every second of it. Repeat sections unnecessarily to fill time if you have nothing else to say.
2) Let’s say you are rehearsing a 16 measure section, with the letters A and B at either end. A great way to save time is to stop the entire orchestra 8 measures after A and request that they resume at three measures before B. Why play those pesky 4 measures when you don’t have to?
3) Singing an articulation (daaah) is always more effective than using a descriptive term (legato)
4) If a section leader has a question upon stopping, ignore them to give your own thoughts first. It really can’t be that important if you didn’t notice it.
5) Be sure to only address some members of the orchestra by name. Calling the principal trumpet by his first name, but the principal clarinet by ‘clarinet’ ensures that your hierarchy is well established in the minds of the entire orchestra.
6) When in doubt of your own rhythmic integrity, let everyone know that they need to be more on top of the beat.
7) Say something really specific before letting which group of instruments you are speaking to know it’s for them. “OK. On the second beat, the tenutos and slur passages of three before B with the percussive G# resolution? Make sure that you are just a smidgen later on that offbeat. Got it cellos?”
8) Count OUT LOUD before starting. This way no one will have to follow you.
9) Repeat sections if you have nothing else to say.
So, there you go! Remember these handy techniques for your future in conducting!
2 replies on “how to be a conductor”
Hi Charles!
I am mostly OK! I was diagnosed with a really early stage of breast cancer back in November, and now have lots of medical excitement ahead of me. I had surgery a couple weeks back, and have a one week accelerated radiation treatment coming up in a week and a half. The radiation thing is supposed to be pretty exceptional, with limited duration of side effects, which means I’ll feel really crappy for a short period of time. Then there will be lots of check ups after that. So, aside fom being kind of concerned with this, I am my obnoxiously cheerful self. Hooray!
Glad to hear it (that you’re doing ok, that is). How’s the biking going?