why i blog

As you may have noticed, the Oregon Symphony, like many other orchestras in the US (and around the world), it going through some tough times. No one knows how it will all turn out. Are we headed for some “new model”? I don’t know, and to be frank, I don’t think anyone in our organization knows the answer to that question, or even what that quasi-mythical “new model” might look like. It’s hard to be a public voice from within an organization that has controlled messages to make – and I don’t want to get in the way of what any of my colleagues need to express or convey to the community in a non-musical fashion. So if you come to this blog looking for insight into what is happening at the Oregon Symphony in a non-artistic sense, you’re going to be sorely disappointed. My tone might change depending upon my mood, or what’s happening behind the scenes, but don’t rely too much on that. Sometimes (more often than not, in fact) I’m in a bad mood at work, and that comes out in what I write. But I hope that what comes through my writing more than that, however, is that I love playing the viola. I love making music at the highest possible level. I love playing with all of my magnificently talented colleagues. I love working for such a great organization, from the stagehands who work alongside us every single service, the customer service reps that sell each and every ticket, the IT guys in a windowless room that keep our beautiful website going 24/7, and our administrative staff, who already do way more than they should with way less bodies than they need – just like the orchestra’s musicians do. I’m not perfect – far from it – and I was reading a post by cyclist and runner Kristen Armstrong (ex-wife of Lance) today in which she wrote the following about how and why she wrote publicly – and it states my case very well:

The things I write about are the things that I am passionate about, interested in, and fighting for in my life.  I do not write about these subjects because I think I am an expert, I write about them becauseI struggle.  I write about authenticity because I know what it is to be disingenuous.  I write about integrity because I know disgrace (and grace).  I write about courage because I know what it is to be weak.  I write about the power of trying, because I want to be okay with failing.  I write about generosity because I battle selfishness.  I write about joy because I know sorrow.  I write about faith because I almost lost mine, and I know what it is to be broken and in need of redemption. I write about gratitude because I am thankful – for all of it.